made it through another monday

mondays at work are crazy because i'm in a call center and people are nutcases on mondays. but i made it through and didn't log out for more than an hour like i so often have to do to get through it.

i've been having too much dopamine lately (normal post seizure condition for me) and such strange thoughts but things are settlish today and that always helps at work.

drank my apple cider vinegar lemonade today so all shall be well.

i don't know how other people do it. working and having a life. it's all i can do to get through work but i'm so damned grateful i have a job and i don't know how the hell i'm so good at it other than that i approach it from a sociological study point of view so i remain nicely detached.

my entire way of dealing with life comes down to a combination of fierce wild love for everything that exists and utter detachment from the interactions that hurt so much. sometimes i think all autistics are born to be buddhist. because the detachment doesn't stop the love and the love doesn't interfere with the detachment. i think they actually enhance each other so that it all grows.

i'm really excited about having an uncensored blog. i dunno what all i'll say here but it's relaxing to not worry about content or how i say things. in my other blog i try to not be too psychotic because i am trying to explain things. this is not an explaining blog. it is a spewing words due to emotional indigestion.